Good Monday

You know it's a good Monday when:

• your 22 months old sleeps from 8PM to 8AM and then again from 8.10AM to 9.30AM
• your husband comes home for lunch, warms lunch up for you, empties the dish washer, takes out the trash and makes a cappuccino
• you get a check for $650 in the mail
• you no longer owe a half a million dollars to anyone
• it is snowing
• your toddler naps without you in the room

Ahhhh.....blessed day!

Cheers my dears!

Surprise, Surprise

My Dears,

just when I thought 2010 and all its turbulence were coming to an end - mind you 2 deaths, a wedding, a cross Atlantic move and a remote home sale will suck the life right out of you - I get invited to a party. You know when you think you are going to a fancy birthday celebration but wonder why the invitee insists on a dress code and that you don't forget your camera...you get a funny feeling. Then the scales fall from your eyes - this ain't a birthday party, this is something much more - this will be my father's wedding.

Now dear, you are right, I cannot complain, as I myself and Mike eloped to get married in secret. But we did have a real wedding where everyone was invited - they received invitations months in advance - and folks had gotten the chance to dress for the occasion. Our household goods are still packed, our suitcases did not reveal any festive clothing - so I borrowed and stole what I could to piece an outfit together.

Despite the whole surprise aspect, the wedding ceremony was short and sweet, bride and groom looked beautiful, we took pictures of the small circle of guests, the weather was stunning and we ate like kings. A really great day. Congratulations to the newlyweds! It is was the right thing to do, it is a blessing to find love again later in life. I am happy for you two!

When we got back I was done, I felt like I had run a marathon, not that I could ever run more than 30 minutes in row much less 4 hours, but I image that is what it feels like - absolute physical exhaustion - from sitting through a delicious 4 course meal.

My sister and I are still licking our infantile wounds - time to grow up, eh?

Did I hear open bar?

Cheers my dears!

D.

Baby Dreams

Bunking together and having the whole family sleep in one room, like in the 19 hundreds, is mainly exhausting but it also has some perks. Mike and I discovered a sweet little secret. Now that Mia can speak....she also talks in her sleep.
The first word we heard in the middle of the night from this tiny sleeping girl was -  not Mami - and not Papi either. In full toddler fashion she winced "NEIN" (German for No).
Recently, her expressions have become more complex and friendly. A few nights ago she exclaimed a very cheerful "Hi Mia!" while fast asleep.

Catch your Breath

Dear reader,

you have every right to be upset. I broke my promise. I didn't blog for weeks, actually months. Well, I didn't WRITE a blog but I was blogging every night before bed - in my head. I searched the whole internet for a USB cable that connects my thoughts straight to the computer - without much success. Here are some of the topics I discussed with myself:

• difference between German and American moms
• blessings of bonus grand parents and parents-in-law - the ones you just adopt to be your in-laws or grandparents because they are great
• why I think in facebook updates
• starting over aka re-immigrating in to your own country and its challenges
• why food is love and why I am proud to wear an apron (a pink one with cup cakes on it)
• what to do "next"
• joys of potty training
• turning 30 and its implications

Yup, looks like you missed out. But not to worry, the days are getting shorter and the blog entries more frequent.

Cheers my dears,

Dani!

June

My apologies. I have broken my promise and didn't even post a monthly update. Sorry my dears. But you know when you don't hear from someone for a while it usually means they are doing fine. And fine I did. June has been a great month.

Quick recap.

We went to Mrs. Kate's wedding in Pinehurst, NC. A cutsie little southern town with lots of golf and old white people in them ;) Then met with Mike's brother and family for a quicky vacay in Colonial Williamsburg, VA

Way to kick off a new month I'd say. But it gets better. Shortly after we return my mom came for a visit and it was just so great to have her and take her mind off of things back home. We went to the San Francisco Zoo, where Mia petted a goat, a turtle and a polar bear.

Next was a Playdate BBQ at Jenny's.

And I don't have to tell you that the soccer world cup started in June too. Which is always a great time and reminds Mike and I of the summer 2006 when in took place in Germany, we had 4 weeks of straight sunshine and we got married (on the only day that summer it rained). Germany is again doing really well and I am hoping we kick Spain's butt today and go to the finals (sorry my Spanish amigas, besos).

The biggest new also got finalized in June. Mike got a super duper promotion and we are going back to Germany :) Needless to say my family is thrilled beyond belief to have us, I correct Mia, back in the homeland. I know we just bought a house. I know we just remodeled it. But hey when Mr. Opportunity knocks on the door you answer!!!


Back to June rocking! It was Mike's Birthday too!

He got a cake with 30 something candles, I lost count after 30 ;)

And then of course (yes call me a dork) the Eclipse Premier on the 30th with my chicas Jenny & Kate!
We stood in line for 2 hours to get the best seats (someone should tell US theaters to adopt the assigned seats concept) in the house. It was worth it. Best Twilight movie yet.

So can you tell, things have been awesomely off the hook?

More about July to come!

Off to see Germany give Spain a beating ;)

Cheers my Dears!

Took Time to Smell the Roses

We went to the San Jose Rose Garden today as our Family Fun Activity - excuse my random capitalizing of words (mainly nouns) I just love doing that - like I am writing the constitution all over again.

The good thing about getting up at 6.30 every day, when Mia wakes us up, is that you get so much done before noon and actually have time for fun stuff on the weekend, because the bathrooms were scrubbed by 9AM.

Cheers my Dears,

Dani!

Getting Organized

I love cooking and am trying out new recipes all the time. That also means I have a huge pile of lose recipes. Some are handwritten by my friends and family, some printed from the internet.

Today I am on a mission to sort them all out and bring them into order. The solution is a recipe binder I created at the Zazzle camolove store. It a has vintage sort of 1950ies look to it - reminds me of the good ole days when there was a lot of cooking in the family.



Once this beauty arrives I will use those clear protector sheets for all recipes and have them nice and cleanly put away in my binder :) And if I am going all Martha Stewart I will use some tabs to make categories...maybe ;)

You can find more recipe binders here!

Hugs

Dani!

Where is it?

Dear Reader,

this entry will serve mainly therapeutic purposes, but feel free to join me on this journey.

I am asking where is it? The proverbial silver lining - it vanished. You know when you get those late night calls from a loved one, in a low voice, quietly searching for words, you know - in your whole body - it can't  be good news. It wasn't - when my sister called me at one in the morning her time a few days ago, to tell me "something very bad has happened". My mom's long time boyfriend had unexpectedly - and still inexplicably- passed away at 51. They had just moved in together. The rest of his boxes arrived last weekend.
I don't know how you deal with this, but in those overwhelming situations my mind goes into "disbelief" mode. What? Really? No! That can't be? It can't be, he just drove us to the airport, I still have his voice clearly in my head. It must be a mistake. Then you face the truth - it really happened. What? Yes, he is not coming back.

To be honest, I am not good at dealing with death, I hate death and feared my parents, especially my mom's death, early on. Luckily, death stayed away from me. My earliest memory of death is our downstairs neighbor Jim dying - I was so mad I wasn't allowed to go to the funeral - "but mom everyone is going!" I could hear his wife Eva weep in her bedroom for weeks.

Then when I was 21 my childhood friend's mom passed away after a long battle with cancer. My first funeral. It hit home, because Angel was the same age as my mom. Our families had been friends for decades, Ivey (my friend) was just 2 days older than me, we went to the same kindergarten and preschool, spent summer breaks together - so close, it could have been me - it could have been my family!

It was my family last winter, my grandma passed away after fighting lung cancer for months. I was sad, I was sad for my dad - after all - losing my mom is one of my worst fears. And I was so sad, because she had been anxiously waiting to meet Mia, my little girl - we were just 2 weeks late.
The night (day time in Germany) when she passed, I experienced an episode of magic. Weird magic. That night I woke up screaming, I do that sometimes, usually because of a bad dream. This one was different. I woke up sitting in bed, still hearing the echo of my scream, and my throat hurt like I had been screaming for my life. When I heard the sad news from my dad in the morning it started making sense. It didn't take much piecing together to figure out that my screaming and her passing coincided. So I am connected to my family on a spiritual level - after all.

The evening I heard of Jens' sudden passing, that family connection materialized again. My 15 months old daughter had an episode of feeling utterly sad, like we had never seen her before. Not tired, not cranky or whiny (we know these states very well) - but sad - big tears running down her face. She would not let go of the paper tissue I had given her (she wanted one because mommy had one wiping her face constantly). That paper tissue even came into the bathtub with her (her happy place). Any of our attempts to take it from her would cause her to cry heartbearkingly. And as the soft paper soaked up the bath water I knew what my mom was doing right now, across an ocean from me - she was crying her heart out.

And here you go readers - I might have found the silver lining in the mourning process. Those who know me, know that I can turn a shit ball into chocolate frosting - over time. Major life events like births and death can make us feel the connection - the spiritual (my husband would call this woo-woo stuff) and the living connection to the people closest to you.

I am so proud of my sister and her boyfriend, who are standing by my mom's side, who where with her this past week from dawn till dusk - they cooked, they distracted, they talked, they offered a shoulder to cry on, they cried together. I have amazing souls like them in my life - I am so blessed!

My husband, my wonderful husband Mike, worked from home the day after we found out, he went on a short hike with us, he got me Starbucks and he cooked Pho for us. He listened to me cry, got me more tissues and stroked my hair while I was weeping. I love him so much, and I tell him every day!

And I can't forget about my wonderful friends and extended family, from all walks of life, who dropped me lines of sympathy after my facebook update (yes welcome to this great new world). Erna, Jenny, Anja, Ani, Franzi, Wy, Jeannie, Shelly, Amy, Jule, Moni, Melanie, Lindsey - thank you for your kind words and prayers!

So here it is, the chocolate frosting, get your cups, I'll whip it on generously!

Death can teach us to live - living is connecting to other people - living is LOVING other people.

In Loving memory of Jens (1959-2010)

Cheers my dears - and make mine a double today!

Dani!

Palydate Pics

Dear Reader,

there are a few entries brewing in my brain right now, none of them ripe yet - remember I really want to do this well.

So for now, I will just brighten your day with pictures of two cuties. My little Mia Mouse and Miss Emmi San at their most recent playdate (and yes, I did fiddle with PhotoShop though these two pretty angels didn't really need it).

Emma

Emma

Emma

Emma & Mia at the Playground

 Mia Mouse in the bathtub - her favorite place on earth!

The Bottom Line
Play dates are good for a mom's soul!

First Soapbox - Loosen Up!

Dear Reader,

you know it was coming - my first rant - the first soapbox entry. And as promised I will tell you what I found in my quick research about the term "being on the soapbox". Having studied the English language from the ground up I am always fascinated by funny figures of speech - one of my favorites is "It's raining cats and dongs.". The mental image of puppies and kittens falling from the sky is just heart warming.

{I warned you about typos, sometimes my typos are funny, instead of "cats and dogs" I wrote "cats and dongs" - so I will leave that up for my own entertainment}

At first I thought, when someone is on the soapbox, they are on it like others are on crystal meth - they are high! Then I  thought of soapy bubbles coming out of the ranter's mouth - filled with air. These notions hold true even once I got to the real meaning. It later dawned on me. The mental movie of a 1920ies Newsie stepping on a wooden soap box to shout out the latest headlines was compelling. My 15 minute google research then revealed, I was close. Back in the 1890ies speakers in London's Hyde Park Corner would step on the sturdy soap boxes to make impromptu speeches about politics, religion and other topics.

Essentially, the soapbox gives people a platform (literally) to be heard, to shout out their opinion on things. I have found that in the online world, where the soapbox got a revival, its meaning has changed to be more of a bitchbox - people complaining, slamming other people and so on.

I tell you dear reader, my soapbox will be a vintage one - less bitching and whining - more shouting strong rhetoric that will capture your attention.

Here we go - *stepping on my wooden crate, clearing my throat*

BLOGGERS (& everyone else) listen up! In my humble opinion the biggest problem of today's discourse about any topic is people believing they know the truth. Well sugar, you don't! Your belief about what is the truth about health care, gay marriage and abortion ect. is just that YOUR BELIEF not the truth. In the best case you, sugar pie, have formed this belief yourself from you life experiences and your values, in the worst case others (like news media, preaches, your mom...) have formed this opinion for you - and you thankfully absorbed it - because someone else saved you time and headache to come up with your own opinion.

Beliefs change - so the "truth" changes. My solution: make it mandatory for everyone in High School student to take at least one sociology class. It will open your mind to see how societies function has a whole.

When I first explored different universities trying to find the right subject for me to study, I visited one mini sociology intro course Humboldt University had set up for us undecided High School students. The topic of the mini lecture was "What is normal?". I loved every minute of this class, every atom in my body was agreeing with the bottom line. "Normal is what a certain group, at a certain time defines as normal." You can substitute normal with "good" "bad" "right" "wrong" ect.

For example, back in the 50ies it was normal to smoke. There were ashtrays build into the lecture hall desks, your doctor would offer you a smoke and so on. Today, that has changed, especially in the US smokers are becoming a minority and are being pushed out - by sending them outside of a building to smoke.

There was a time when it was normal for woman not to be allowed to vote and stick to running the household. Today there are several female heads of state and woman make more than 50% of America's work force.

There was a time when people who were attracted to their own gender were considered ill. Only in 1973, the American Psychiatric Association voted to remove homosexuality from their Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). Wow, even science and doctors don't know the "truth".

There was a time when it was normal for a family to have 6 or more kids, today those families get their own TV shows - because they are so not normal.

So sugar, before you get all riled up about a topic, spend nights tossing and turning giving mental speeches in your head to an audience that will never really hear you, consider this - it's all relative - it can all change - usually not without a fight. But you get the idea. What is "right" today  is out tomorrow, or is right somewhere else. The British think it's right to drive on the left side of the road, try doing that in the US and you will get arrested!

The Bottom Line
Loosen up! You don't know the truth, because it doesn't exist in a manifest way - it gets defined by the majority of a certain group of people at a certain time.

*stepping off of the my vintage crate*

Cheers my dears,

Dani!

Can I be a Foodie Too?

A foodie is "someone who has an ardent or refined interest in food." I am not sure about ardent or refined, but I do have a big interest in food. I love it! When I'm alone, I watch the Food Network - Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives is my favorite one. This is where I get some inspiration, as well as from my subscription to Bon Appetit and Amy's mom - the appetizer QUEEN!

There are lot of yummy food and recipe blogs out there - the best part about them being the mouthwatering pictures. So, when my husband suggested making waffles this morning, I got inspired to grab my camera and have my premier as a blog foodie as I document making Belgian waffles.

I started taking pictures of the dough bowl and the waffle iron itself. This is what my husband Mike had to say "Honey, you take pictures of the weirdest things - I am surprised you haven't photographed your own poo yet." Ok, the beginning of my foodie career didn't go with as support as planned - and yes, welcome to a Saturday morning in my house.

Yet, I was determined. So here is the recipe I got from allrecipes.com slightly modified (and this is a yeast dough, so start an hour before you actually want to eat - why you would be up then I don't know - sometimes in the battle of food vs. sleep food wins!):

Ingredients

• 1/2 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast
• 2 tablespoons warm milk (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
• 1-1/2 egg yolks
• 1-1/3 cups and 1 tablespoon warm milk (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)
• 1/4 cup and 2 tablespoons butter, melted and cooled to lukewarm
• 1/4 cup white sugar
• 3/4 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1-1/2 egg whites

This will make 4 huge waffles.

1. In a small bowl, dissolve yeast in 1/4 cup warm milk. Let stand until creamy, about 10 minutes.
2. In a large bowl, whisk together the egg yolks, 1/4 cup of the warm milk and the melted butter. Stir in the yeast mixture, sugar, salt and vanilla. Stir in the remaining 2 1/2 cups milk alternately with the flour, ending with the flour. Beat the egg whites until they form soft peaks; fold into the batter. Cover the bowl tightly with plastic wrap. Let rise in a warm place until doubled in volume, about 1 hour.
3. Preheat the waffle iron. Brush with oil and spoon about 1/2 cup (or as recommended by manufacturer) onto center of iron. Close the lid and bake until it stops steaming and the waffle is golden brown. Serve immediately or keep warm in 200 degree oven. 

And here is my waffles iron. Mike bought this for us a Costco, after one of the many ruined weekend mornings that started out with burned waffles in need of being scraped of the waffle iron and utensils being thrown around the kitchen.

Isn't she a beauty? Super easy to clean, actually you don't even need to clean it - my favorite kind of kitchen tool. Now, the waffles were good, but for my taste not sweet enough, so add some more sugar. They were also not cakey enough - not sure what to do to add more cakieness - more flour?

Anyways, enjoy the pictures:

The Bottom Line:
I love to eat and I love to look at food.

Cheers my Dears,

Dani!

First Entry - Good Intentions

Dear reader,

I have been waiting to create my own blog for a long time. Now that I will turn 30 this year, I thought it is a good time to start. I had some reservations before. I have this high standard that all (or at least most) things I do have to be "good", serve a purpose and be something new. The fact that I really don't have anything earth shattering to say didn't change, but my attitude towards just saying what's on my mind, regardless of the reactions has changed.

There are also a couple of promises I intend to keep. I am promising these things more to myself than to you, my dear (not yet existent) readers.

1. I will keep my entries short and sweet, so you can read the whole thing without your eyes turning backwards in your head.
2. I will update the blog at least once a week.
3. I will be honest, no cover up or sugar coating, my thoughts will materialize here unfiltered and with that follows
4. I will take responsibility for the things I write. Not everything you read on here you will like or agree with and that is ok, I take responsibility for for what I write and towards the people I write about. I will use cover names to protect certain people. Of course you, certain people, will know who you are, and that is ok. It's just more convenient to say certain things to an anonymous internet crowd than to your closest peeps - I don't care who you are that is a truth!
5. In order to keep some what organized (yes this blog serves my own therapeutic purpose too) I will summarize each post with a bottom line - dang that should have been my blog title.

Fair warning
I am not a native speaker (or writer) of the English language, also my thoughts race faster than my fingers can type, so every now and then there might be typos and missing words - don't laugh - just think of all the million thoughts that are crossing my mind - battling over who gets to be published, spoken or thought to the end.

Great expectations
Here are some of the topics I want to blog about, because it is part of who I am and what I do:
Motherhood - I am first time mom of a toddler, needless to say I could write a book about my daily baby escapades.
Soapbox - I will find out where this term comes from, but I can already tell you it will be rants and just my very own opinion on things, more than likely there will aspects you won't like, because well - there is just no one else like me, with the exact same thought, right?
Products - I do want to share some of the wonderful things out there that I love and that make my life a lot easier, or more fun.
Pictures - I do want to incorporate photographs of my life - a picture sometimes says more than a thousand word.
Memoir - I have always wanted to write a memoir of my life, I had some crazy things happening - as does everyone else- either way, I think some of them are very entertaining :)
My Life - These entries will start with "Today I did..." documenting what's going on in my life right now.
Life Purpose - I love helping people and at occasions I will share my philosophy on life, or just talk about random life questions - hopefully you will find it helpful.
Business - I am running an online business and probably discuss some practices that helped me grow my enterprise
Culture - Being a German expat in the USA, there are quite some things I notice are different.
Foodie - Recipes and love for food need an outlet too!


So, not to break with promise number 1, I will sing off for tonight.

Cheers my Dears,

Dani!